Originally posted January 11, 2013.
I came home this evening thinking I would get some type of peace. Come home, make dinner, put on my Hello Kitty pajamas and call it a day. No. It wasn’t going to be like that at all. That’s how my life works. When it’s calm, a storm hits. Why? That’s how my life is. I try to keep a balance….but no.
I am in backyard having the cigarette that I promised would be a resolution for 2013. Let’s not focus on THAT…this story is even bigger. Our next door neighbor has a daughter who is 22, but is mentally a 14 year old. The Grandmother went to a home two houses down tonight, banged on a door. The man answered. “You raped my Granddaughter!” was her retort. He said, “She said she was 20.” Grandma said, “I am calling the police.” He said, “Go ahead.” My husband is outside now talking to her and his other neighbor. What a great night.
When I came outside, she was on the phone with the police department while telling her story to my husband and someone else. I did not say NOT ONE WORD. Why? I’ve been there before. I do not know if the story is true or not. I am not on either side of the coin. However, I do know what it’s like to hear someone being accused of something. Maybe it’s true and maybe it’s not. This is truly a sticky situation.
Hit the rewind button. My son was nine years old at the time. I was going through a divorce and my ex-husband decided to move into an apartment a block away from me. I thought that was completely strange, but whatever. I got a phone call three months into my divorce from said Husband at the time. The police are here. The school called them and our Son said that my Ex beat him. I thought…oh come on. He’s a total douche bag and he wasn’t the most attentive Dad…but my Ex would not beat MY KID. Notice the caps…yes, I’ve taken care of him. He’s 22 now..and I am still his Mother, Confidant and Friend.
I had to drive to “said apartment” and tell the police that my Ex would not do that…because he knew I would kill him. That’s for sure. The hard part was that I had to explain that my son at that time was DYING for attention and that he (to this day) suffered from several forms of mental illness. That was a very difficult conversation to have with men with guns. I saved my Ex’s career…although he’s such an ass that he forgets.
Fast-forward to tonight. I feel bad for Grandma neighbor. She’s responsible for a “woman” with a mind of a fourteen year old. What’s true? What’s right? Been there and done that. I couldn’t have THAT conversation with her. “Are you sure that’s what happened?” “Is it accurate what she has said?” Grandma needs to figure that out on her own. I wish I could help but at some point people need to LEARN that although someone is absolutely adamant about a situation…it it’s 50% perception and 5o% truth. I am speaking from a background of raising a mentally ill child and being a survivor of a violent crime…and I can still discern when something is “off.”
If she is telling the truth…I will pray for her. If she is lying, I feel really sorry for the male neighbor two doors down. I just pray someday that violent sexual predators are no more and that researchers find a cure for mental illness…and not shove medications down their throats with the “HOPE” they will get better.