First of all, I have to apologize to my friends and family who are on my personal Facebook page. Or at least I thought it was personal. I will get to that later. I had a full-blown writers meltdown. It was a def con 5 high alert. No, it was more like the terrorist level “Severe” from Homeland Security. I have felt that my writing here has been OK. It’s not Pulitzer Prize material in my opinion. I am in need of guidance from someone in saying “Wow that’s great, keep it up” or “That is the worst shit I’ve ever read and you can do better.”
Second, I really hate the “Facebook Page” idea. Actually, I really hate Facebook in general. It really sucks. I hate that you have to use Facebook to generate more traffic to a persons blog, website etc., than having to use Mark’s piece of trash site. However, I know I need it to produce more traffic to my website. I’ve asked family and friends forever and a day to please go like my page so that my works are published by Facebook. I just want to generate the traffic, that is all. I am not asking for money or the cure for cancer. Please note I’ve asked OVER AND OVER again. I have friends who have websites who make homemade jewelry and or groom dogs that have more likes than my page.
Thirdly, I am frustrated about my outline for my current book(s) I am writing. I actually have two outlines. I am that nuts. However, I cannot decide if I want to move ahead with a book about my life OR a story of a great man who molded me to who I am today. I feel a bit lost about it. Plus add the strain of a family member who has been in the hospital now for three weeks, full-time job, my Lupus (which always sucks big time) etc., it’s been a bit rough.
So without further a-do, I am calling myself out on my own website because I deserve it. I will tell you why later. The meltdown was eerily like Natalie Portman with The Lonely Island video. I felt a bit like this last night:
Here is “said” meltdown:
“I don’t ask for a lot. HOWEVER! I don’t know what it takes to like my Facebook Page regarding my writings. A Starbucks card? Best Buy? A free trip to Paris? I don’t find this an arrogant request nor do I reallycare. Dogs get more likes than my page. All I am asking is for people to like it so I get more traffic for my website. WOW…that must be hard to push a God Damned Button. Sometimes women need to stand up and say….REALLY? Must be tough!
Wait there is more….unfortunately.
“I pour my heart out on my website and have NOT ONE BUT TWO outlines for 2 books. I work a full time job and have a super shitty illness. I have held my tongue for awhile but no more. This shit is ridiculous.”
Ugh, last comment….this is Ms. Garland at her meanest and ugliest. It happens from time to time.
“Seriously….I am blasting a lot of people here but quite frankly….it’s a call out that’s true. Don’t like it….there is an unfriend button for that too. When I have a UPC code on my Best Selling book….don’t ask me for a loan, a house, to fund your child’s college education or a car. Out!”
Aren’t I just a champ? A Charmer? Wow. Now in my defense, I had a lot of responses and likes to that rant. I was very surprised by that. I did receive feedback from co-workers especially who came out to say, “Hey, I like your website and your writing.” It made me feel good and maybe that was the validation that I needed maybe? I checked this morning and my friends and family still love me. That is good news. I am STILL looking for that super awesome mentor though. I will tell you this. I believe I may have found my editor for my book and she is a childhood friend. For that I am super excited and thank you Cheryle! *During my edit, you are right Cheryle…passive, passive, passive!*
Last night I went to bed and I got an alert on my phone. I checked it and it was someone who apparently follows me as a subscriber on Facebook. Now I thought that my Facebook was on LOCKDOWN to just friends and family but it was not. I deleted the original post on my personal Facebook page because I wanted this whole subject here on my website. I actually have a few subscribers so I was completely unaware that a complete stranger could see what I was writing on my own personal page on Facebook. So to my family and friends: the “security” measures on Facebook is a total sham. To be honest: I felt it a bit odd. However, this person put me in check. See below:
When I read this, my immediate reaction was….of course, who are you? How could you see this post? How dare you say that! However, I sat back in bed and thought: wait a minute. She is absolutely correct. I do need to get over myself. I was having a 100% writing meltdown, temper tantrum, feel sorry for myself pity party. I am actually thankful to Christa in New York for setting me straight. You don’t have to like what I write, say or do. Everyone can tell me to go to hell quite frankly. I deserve that reaction and I plan to place the comment on my website and send her a thank you. It’s only fair.
What I’ve learned: go with my gut reaction. Write about the things that matter to me. If people like it, then God bless them and thanks for reading it. If you don’t like what I write, that’s okay too. Also, I now believe that Facebook is absolutely stupid, a bit evil and 100% NOT necessary to generate more traffic. It’s an information mining operation! Thanks to my readers and again, sorry for the meltdown everyone!